Week 22 Day 1

   Here is a photo of what almost 22 weeks look like for us. 

It was taken over the Labor Day weekend and it was our last camping trip before junior/juniorette is welcomed to the world extrawombial.  Yes, I know that is not a real word. I was being crafty.  Or I like to think I was being crafty and wordsmithy like.  I’m obviously not very good at it.

   It was a good trip.  Fortunately, we had family taking very good care of us so we had to do very little other than take walks and watch our cousin throw rocks across the river.

Despite this, it was a very tiring weekend and the dogs think so, too.  See?

Week 21 Day 7

   “Oh god!  The baby’s rotting my brain!”

  I heard this from my wife in reference to the short-term memory loss and general absent-mindedness experienced from the pregnancy.  There is some dispute as to whether this is an old wives tale or if there are studies that actually prove lower brain function due to pregnancy.  See articles here and here.  It makes sense that if the body goes into overdrive making a new human being, certain priorities get shifted around.  Maybe brain functions are not as important because everyone in the family/tribe takes extra care of a pregnant woman so she doesn’t HAVE to be smart enough to outrun the big scary predator.

   I propose that there is an added evolutionary reason.  The baby is “rotting my wife’s brain” in order to give me (the husband/partner) a taste of what it is like to raise a helpless infant.  I’m NOT saying that my wife is a helpless infant!  Pregnancy by no means makes a person stupid.  But there is extra care required on occasion and I really hope that the higher brain functions return soon after the delivery.

   Of course, this is assuming there is any truth to “pregnancy brain” as it has come to be known.

   Wow.  After rereading this, I totally sound like an ass.  

Week 21 Day 2

   Pregnant women glow.  No really.  They glow!  So why is it when they are told they are glowing they get real sarcastic and refuse to believe it?  How can they not see how beautiful they are?

  So I looked it up and here is the proof.  Dr. Sears says so and it must be true!  Read it and weep, ladies.  Increased blood flow and secretions from oil glands make the glow happen.

  Ok, and maybe there are some funky male hormones coursing through my body making me want to shower adoration on my wife.  I’d like to think this just happens because we are truly perfect and stupid for each other.  But it makes sense biologically to want to protect her and any future offspring to increase the chances of my genetic survival.

   Yeah, THAT doesn’t make me sound like an ass at all!

Week 21 Day 1

   Since I’m still kind of on this rant, I’d just like to add that we REALLY love the comments that go something like this: “Enjoy it now while you can.”  Or “Get all the sleep you can now because you won’t get any once the baby is born.”

   Let’s examine these statements shall we?  “Enjoy it now while you can”?  This insinuates that we haven’t been enjoying it so we’d better start.  (Never mind that we’ve been married for 11 glorious years and are ready to make our already awesome family plus one.) 

   Or maybe a statement like this suggests that once the baby is here we’re never going to enjoy anything again for the rest of our lives.  If this were the case, why didn’t the human race become extinct long ago?  I know people mean well when they say things like this, but I really just feel sad for them because they are either lying through their teeth or they missed something vital.  (I say that now)

   And get all our sleep now?  What, can I bank it?  If I sleep for 72 straight hours, can I save it for when I really need it?  No?  I didn’t think so.  And last time I checked, I’m still employed and this employment is responsible for the standard of living that we’ve become accustomed to.

   I don’t think I will be able to repeat this enough:  The only thing we know is that we don’t know how much our lives will change.  We know we’re going to get tired.  We know that this is going to be hard.  We know that once we become parents, we will never cease to be parents.  And we don’t know just how intense all of these things will be. 

   But all you existing parents out there:  do you really have to rub it in?  I’m trying real hard not to be an ass but you’re not making it any easier on me. 

   I hope when the shoe is on the other foot (ours) we can find something else to say to our pregnant friends/family/children thus breaking the circle of assyness.

Week 20 Day 5

   Questions she/we find irritating:

*What’s the sex of the baby?

*How are you feeling?

*When is the due date?

*Have you thought about names?

Instead, we would prefer these questions:

*Are you planning to find out the sex? 

   Please note: sex and gender are not the same.  Ultrasounds are still a relatively recent development.  (And not 100% accurate)  Why do people insist on knowing the sex of their baby when their parents, grandparents and thousands of years of ancestors didn’t know?

*Is it a good or a bad day? 

   Because really, what is a pregnant woman supposed to say when you ask her how she’s feeling?  “um.. I don’t know… PREGNANT?”  “Like my insides are getting pushed all around”  “Like my cartilage is turning to jell-o in order to loosen everything up to give birth.”

*How far along is the baby? 

   The baby will come when it is darn good and ready.  So the due date is a deceptive term.  It’s an estimate.  We don’t know the due date.  Nobody does.  But we do know how long since conception.

*No alternative to the names question. 

   Yes.  Of course we’ve thought about names.  We’re having a baby for goodness sake!  We’re planning for the future.  How could we NOT think about names.  You’ll find out what its name is when you meet it.

My feelings coincide with my partner’s for the most part.  I will never truly know what it’s like to support another living being inside my own body.  At least not until the earth gets invaded by some parasitic alien life form.  But even then, I bet it will be different.  And because of this I will never truly understand her reaction to the question “How are you feeling?”  I think I can understand it, but I will never understand it.  To say I do makes me an ass.

Week 20 Day 3

   Pregnancy game #3!  Paddy-cake with the baby. 

   Now we not only feel the little slugger, but we can see the movement when my wife is lying still.  When this happens we both giggle hysterically.  And since the baby can now hear this reaction from us, we are probably already conditioning it to continue moving more persistently to get a reaction.

   The only time we are able to notice this, of course, is at night when we are about to go to bed.  Not the best time for the baby to wake up since we are trying to go to sleep.  And since there’s still 4 ½ months to go, I imagine this will get very old very quickly.  Well… At least for my partner it will get old.  I think it could entertain me for hours.

  Which led her to respond with “You might call it paddy-cake with the baby, I call it being double-teamed.”  I could blame the baby but that would make me an ass.

   

Week 20 Day 1

   Halfway check-in point.

   I had another “what the heck are we doing moment” yesterday.  In 20 weeks we’re going to have a little one.  Yikes.

   So I’m going to probably ramble here a bit.

   I’ve started going back to work so the summer is over (for me).  I finished all the projects I set out to do for the summer.  The nursery is pretty much set up.  We’re feeling a bit impatient, now, but I know we will value the next few months since they will be our last months to ourselves.  Without the new addition, that is.

   I would say that I’ve hit a bit of a wall when it comes to not being an ass during this momentous event.  I haven’t been reading or posting as much.  It is more difficult to muster up the energy to stay positive and cheery.  That could be because I’m starting up work again, but I have a gut feeling there is something going on in addition to that.

   Then again, it could just be the natural ebbs and flows of emotions that we all feel accentuated by the hormones of my partner (and probably myself).  The chemical/physical changes that male partners experience during pregnancies are still largely unknown.  I will use this as an excuse.

   But due to my wonderful partner’s urging, I’ve been reading The Womanly Art of Breastfeeding.  Lots of good information here.  But I would caution you to wait until after breakfast before reading any section on bowel movements and meconium consistencies.

   Things are looking great and here’s to another flawless 20 weeks.

   Come on, second wind!  Don’t fail me now!